RSS Ake’s Pains

  • I Will Mock You With My Sock May 10, 2020
    I am wearing a sock on my face out in public. Before now, it would be unconscionable for me even to imagine the circumstances that would lead to this bizarre behavior.But it is true. I am repeatedly wearing a sock on my face out in public.An outbreak of the bat-flu has infected the world, the […]
  • Toilet Paper Therapy March 21, 2020
    If the current world situation wasn’t stressful enough, I am now dealing with a severe personal problem. I am constipated. But not just mildly constipated. No, I’m backed up like the L.A. freeway at rush hour with a three-car pile-up in the middle-lane. But I am not producing any pile-ups, no matter how often I […]
  • I Demand the Constitutional Right to Wear Chinos February 5, 2020
    The big impeachment trial is ending, which featured lots of horrible behavior. It was all a big $h!+ - slinging contest, in which each side insisted that the other’s $h!+ smelled much worse than theirs. At the end, everyone ended up covered in $h!+ and nothing got done except that a bunch of our tax […]
  • A Much-Needed Sabbatical January 21, 2020
    I began writing Ake’s Pain in May 2011. I have posted over 249 essays which I have compiled into three books. (Book 3 expected release is March 2020).And I need a break. Over the last year, sometimes I have become a little bored of my own writing. Which means, of course, maybe you too – […]
  • Heading Off A Cat-astrophe January 6, 2020
    Here are my most enchanting memories of last year, which never made it into a blog post.  Now there could be hundreds of these moments.  However with my fading memory, I can only remember two.The Cats InvadeWe watched my daughter’s two cats, Dede and Buddy, while she prepared her house for sale. I liked having […]